Post by irishstick on Jun 28, 2008 15:26:28 GMT 1
A Welshman buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are pregnant, and phones a vet for help.
The vet tells him that maybe he should try artificial insemination.
The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant.
The vet tells him that the sheep will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in the grass when they are pregnant.
The man hangs up and gives the matter some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means that he has to impregnate the sheep himself.
So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and then goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. As they are all standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them all into the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.
Next morning, he wakes and finds the sheep still standing around. "Try again," he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls knackered into bed.
The next morning he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "They're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."
The vet tells him that maybe he should try artificial insemination.
The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant.
The vet tells him that the sheep will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in the grass when they are pregnant.
The man hangs up and gives the matter some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means that he has to impregnate the sheep himself.
So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and then goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. As they are all standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them all into the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.
Next morning, he wakes and finds the sheep still standing around. "Try again," he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls knackered into bed.
The next morning he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. "No," she says, "They're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."
